<br>
Lockstock<br>
If there's one thing I've learned in my many years of enforcing the laws<br>
of this city, it's that the journey down to Urinetown offers no<br>
surprises. Not even from the very toughest amongst us. On that journey<br>
expect only the expected.<br>
<br>
It's a hard, cold, tumble of a journey<br>
Worthy of a gurney, a bumble down<br>
A slapped face, smacked with a mace<br>
Certain to debase is our stumble down<br>
<br>
It's a path that leads you only one place<br>
Horrible to retrace, a crumble down<br>
A hard, cold, tumble of a tourney<br>
Jumble of a journey to Urinetown<br>
<br>
Lockstock and Barrel<br>
Julie Cassidy<br>
Went to a field behind a tree<br>
Saw there was no one who could see<br>
<br>
Lockstock<br>
Her pee -<br>
<br>
Barrel<br>
<br>
Lockstock and Barrel<br>
And Jacob Rosenblum<br>
Thought he was safe up in his room<br>
Didn't know the jars he kept up there<br>
Would obligate a trip to Urine-tomb!<br>
<br>
Lockstock<br>
There are those who think our<br>
Methods vicious -<br>
<br>
Barrel<br>
Overly malicious -<br>
<br>
Lockstock<br>
A bunch of brutes, but it's we who<br>
Gather for the people -<br>
<br>
Barrel<br>
Tavern to the steeple -<br>
<br>
Lockstock<br>
Lawful fruits!<br>
Our task: bring a little order -<br>
<br>
Barrel<br>
Swindle out a hoarder -<br>
<br>
Lockstock<br>
From what he loots, as the book says<br>
"Certainly a season" -<br>
<br>
Barrel<br>
Trample out a treason -<br>
<br>
All<br>
With hobnail boots!<br>
Roger Roosevelt<br>
Kept a cup below his belt<br>
Cup ran over when he knelt<br>
<br>
Lockstock<br>
He smelt -<br>
<br>
Barrel<br>
We dealt!<br>
<br>
All<br>
And Joseph "Old Man" Strong<br>
Held his pee for much too long<br>
Hoped his son might bail him out<br>
His guess was good but also wrong!<br>
<br>
Lockstock<br>
Years past all lived in a jungle<br>
Scooping out a bungle, nature's bowl<br>
Life of constant deprivation<br>
Certain aggravation took its toll<br>
<br>
Soon learned power of the truncheon<br>
Organize a function king to pawn<br>
So if peace is what you're after<br>
Urinetown's the rafter to hang it on!<br>
<br>
Girl Cop 1<br>
Julie Cassidy -<br>
<br>
Boy Cop 1<br>
Jacob Rosenbloom -<br>
<br>
Boy Cop 2<br>
Roger Roosevelt -<br>
<br>
Boy Cop 1<br>
Jacob Rosenbloom -<br>
<br>
Girl Cop 1<br>
Julie Cassidy -<br>
<br>
Boy Cop 3<br>
Joseph Old Man Strong -<br>
<br>
Lockstock and Barrel<br>
Don't be like them! Don't be like them!<br>
<br>
Lockstock<br>
It's a hard, cold,<br>
Tumble of a journey<br>
Worthy of a gurney,<br>
A bumble down<br>
A slapped face,<br>
Smacked with a mace<br>
Certain to debase<br>
Is our stumble down Female Cops<br>
<br>
It's a hard, cold,<br>
Tumble of a journey<br>
Worthy of a gurney,<br>
A bumble down<br>
A slapped face,<br>
Smacked with a mace<br>
Certain to debase Male Cops<br>
<br>
<br>
It's a hard, cold,<br>
Tumble of a journey<br>
Worthy of a gurney,<br>
A bumble down<br>
A slapped face,<br>
Smacked with a mace<br>
<br>
All<br>
It's a path that leads you only one place<br>
Horrible to retrace, a crumble down<br>
A hard, cold, tumble of a tourney<br>
Jumble of a journey to Urinetown!<br>
 <br>