Here's my intro (so people know).
He got his shoulder inna hanger and a chipper on his shoulder 
So away we go!
Why don't I know'Mister So and So?' 
'Cause he's a loser gabbagabba hey ho now let's go!

Let me tell you 'bout this friend of mine
His stories go on 'til yawanna DIE.

She's no catch no. You're attached though!
She got her Bettie Page bangs 
Man she's seen some better days she thinks your Romeo.
She can't quite tell why you can't spell
Or add 2 and 2 or she and you 'cause you're a loser
So away we go!

Let me tell you 'bout this friend of mine
Her Spanish blows on 'til yawanna DIE.

I want it all
But 'all' means that I get nuthin'
Nuthin' but a mean streak.

Talk is cheap and all this week 
Ya been a shower not a go-er and I'm over gettin' hosed I think it's time you GO.
You're no friend of mine.