<br>
ARPAD SINGS:<br>
I have trained myself,<br>
Going shelf by shelf,<br>
And I know every item in the store,<br>
Every tube, jar, box, bottle, carton and container,<br>
Where they are,<br>
What they cost,<br>
What they're for,<br>
<br>
Although it's something you have never thought about Mr Maraczek,<br>
Try me,<br>
You need a man who knows the business inside out Mr Maraczek,<br>
Try me,<br>
<br>
You need help or I'd have never spoken,<br>
And why break someone in? <br>
when I'm already broken.<br>
<br>
In this emergency I wouldn't let you down Mr Maraczek,<br>
Try Me,<br>
Oh I can see by the uncertain way you frown that you ask yourself,<br>
Why me?<br>
For first class clerking and consciencious working,<br>
Mr Maraczek, why not,<br>
Try me.<br>
<br>
MR MARACZEK SPOKEN:<br>
Alright. This cream is sour. Very sour. Take it back.<br>
<br>
ARPAD SINGS:<br>
You wish to return this jar madam,<br>
Certainly right you are madam,<br>
You say it smells like a drownded cat -<br>
It does at that,<br>
At Maraczek's madam we claim with pride the customer must be satisfied,<br>
The customer must be satisfied,<br>
By the way we have a special sale on autumn heather - <br>
Let me spray some on your hand,<br>
Here we'll smell it together,<br>
<br>
(SPOKEN)It has the three elements of good perfume,<br>
Attractive to the nose,<br>
Invisible to the eye,<br>
And fuctional,<br>
<br>
(SINGS)My wife has used it time and again,<br>
It's very appealing to us men,<br>
I use it myself every now and then,<br>
<br>
MR MARACZEK:<br>
I'll take it!<br>
<br>
ARPAD:<br>
(SPOKEN) Certainly madam. Ah Miss Ritter, (cough) Miss Ritter,<br>
<br>
(SINGS)<br>
Thats twenty and six for the autumn heather,<br>
Eight and three for the cream,<br>
Thirty two even for that bottle of mermaids dream,<br>
One and three for the eyebrow pencil,<br>
Nine for the large shampoo,<br>
And then for the jar you're bringing back thats four and two for you,<br>
That's a total of ninety eight less four and two for the jar,<br>
Out of a hundred,<br>
Here's your change,<br>
Five and two,<br>
There you are,<br>
the biggest sale in several years I believe,<br>
<br>
Thank you madam, <br>
Please call again,<br>
Glad I could help, <br>
Here is my card,<br>
Thank you madam,<br>
Please call again,<br>
Do call again, madam.<br>
<br>
I would glady grow a moustache if you like Mr Maraczek,<br>
Try me,<br>
And I would even think of giving up my bike Mr Maraczek,<br>
Try me,<br>
<br>
For first class clerking and consciencious working,<br>
Mr Maraczek, why not,<br>
Try me.<br>
<br>

 <br>