Sammy J - Cancer lyrics

rate me

<b>Cancer</b> by <i>Sammy J</i><br />

If I gave you something which you found quite useful

But told you I couldn't be sure if that product was safe

Or radioactive, you'd have two options in store

Option one: You could put it aside for however long

Scientists took to agree it was safe

Option two: You could store it right next to your balls

And only remove it when answering calls

At which point you mash it right up to your brain

And then store it alongside your penis again

And in twenty-five years a new government will be elected

By promising to reduce taxes on anti-inflammatory ball cancer drugs

And we'll all line up at the chemist's like mugs

The ladies as well, 'cos by then you'll have balls

They'll be bigger than ours, 'cos you make longer calls

And phones will be banned from all pubs and workplaces

As we apply cream to our tumorous faces

We laugh at smokers and people with fake tans

And tell ourselves that we've progressed

While microwave frequencies pierce through our scrotums

And boil the milk in our breasts