Quest

Quest - May 10th, 2012

rate me

Thursday morning tripping like what the fuck am I missing

Got boxes across the room, my girl is calling constant

My mamma speaking nonsense like you should just let your father hold your car until he comes back

Can't fade, stressed out

All along saw this shit coming like fortune tellers eviction notices served

Every time I told my father felt like it got on his nerves like

Don't trip, promise I got it under control, I got some money coming

You know, typical bullshit

Kassandra's wondering if my phone is missing or tripping 12 missed calls

Don't wanna talk or bother to listen, hold emotions in

Focusing on a proper position, I just got fired from work and my tape ain't doing the digits, fuck

Chance The Rapper dropped 10 day, did twice my shit

My jealousy has been enraged gotta fight that shit

A struggle rapper trying to find a way

But gotta pack his bags before its 12 and cops'll come invade, what you doing QuESt

21 and fucking up you bout to push it back to mammas, nigga, what the fuck is up

Rap ain't doing quite the numbers that you once was throwing up

You made mistakes that cost you dearly clearly you ain't know enough

Christopher Martin inside the speakers racing with time

Father asking what’s wrong, nigga, fuck, is you blind?

You don't see the disappointment, you ignoring the signs

How you broke another promise for the millionth time

A year ago was on my own, had a new apartment working two jobs

Independent grinding, you was locked up

Provided you a place to stay, a total lack of privacy

Bit my tongue out of love and never told what was inside of me

I left that, we got a place, you told me that I got you

Just work on music, let me pay the bills, let me try to be the father that I couldn't be

Gave you a chance, fast forward 6 months and we doing the same dance

Staring at me with the eyes of a broken soul in his 50's

Tears streaming down on your cheek

Hugging me closely like son just give me a week and we'll be back on our feet

The taste of the defeat, denial in its highest of peak

Faking a smile to keep a distant composure, gave ‘em my keys and walked away knowing the damage ain’t over

My girl pulled up in her scion, helped me put my shit in the trunk

Hugged and kissed me right on the cheek as I hopped in the front

Messages on my phone from my mother like hurry got work tomorrow and please don't waken your brother, my lord

I thought I got away from all of this ran away from my issues I need a fucking psychologist, man

Everything is moving backwards, a cycle full of failures reenacted

My girl driving trying to tell me this is for the best just relax if you need some space I can scoop you anytime, such a good girl

I wonder how I got her in the first place, keep me calm through these earthquakes, swear I can feel the earth shake, it’s

1 AM and I'm regretting every life decision, wishing I could go back and follow my intuition

And stop talking at the times when I should have just listened

Maybe then I wouldn't be in this fatal position

Slightly religious, probably should have been a better Christian

Looking for answers and feeling like I already missed ‘em

And I ain't trying to go back

But I gotta go back

Shits never would it should be even fucked up mamma cutting no slack

So many years on my own I struggled and fought it did the opposite easy made simple movements retarded

Life did a 360, past has departed

I swear you know it’s real when you end up back where you started

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