Nice Peter - Billy Mays Versus Ben Franklin lyrics

rate me

(Ben Franklin -)

I’m big Ben Franklin, and this shant be pretty

Let me instruct you how we battle in the city of Philly

You couldn’t sell Rick James a bag of crack, you’re out of practice

My victory’s more certain than death or taxes

Fact is:

You’re a hack

Whack QVC joke

You peddle soap

That cleans bird sh&t from my windows

I’ll craft a lyrical coffin and then spit the nails in

Call me Arthur Miller son cause it’s death of a salesman!

(Billy Mays -)

Hi Billy Mays here with a special TV offer.

Watch me crush this bald fat foppish founding father

I’ll take my awesome auger and sow your Quaker oats

I’ll shoot your rhymes down like a regiment of red coats

I’m the lord of the pitch and leader in home sales

You’re just a lumpy pumpkin who invented the mail

Benny’s got kite’n key but you’re in for a shock

When I strike you with bolts from my lightening rod cock

(Ben Franklin -)

Stop!

I protest these intolerable raps

It takes just one easy payment for me to whoop your @ss!

Cause I’m mint, I’m money!

I’m an educated gentleman so join or die Bill.

Cause it’s all about the Benjamin

(Billy Mays -)

But wait! There’s more!

(VOICE OVER)

Is there anyone out there who could finish this battle? Anyone? Anyone?

(Shamwow Guy -)

I can

You following me camera guy?

Cause it’s about to get furious

You’re gonna love my nuts until you’re bi-focal-curious

Your boy George chopped down trees

You couldn’t break a piece of balsa

Slap chop your face

Make a double chin salsa

Your style is so broke

They call you Poor Richard

It’s bad enough I gotta see you every-time I tip a stripper

Vince against a founding father is just too bad

Cause after this America is gonna lose a Dad<br />

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Thanks to shotpixel