JIMMY BUFFETT - I’m No Russian lyrics

rate me

I’m no Russian, not even Prussian

Doorman at the yacht club was my one claim to fame

Some say I’m noisy, hell, I’m from Jersey

This chasing money can do things to your brain

How does a shore boy like me

Wind up out on the Black Sea?

Dropped out of Harvard then joined the Coast Guard

Made a faithful 50 on a boat in Gitmo

Did my duty but missed the booty

I heard that Saint Barts was the place I should go

How could a coastie like me

Sail off into infamy?

I couldn’t surf or sing or play the guitar

All I ever did was steal an oligarch’s car

My million dollar joy ride was not the perfect crime

And those bad boys from little Odessa don’t believe in wasting time

A Lamborghini elemento ain’t your average island car

Park it close the driver told me,, sounding like some kind of tsar

With the magnum full of Cristal and devil weed inside

I thought it was crazy not to take a ride

Flying thru Gustavia, passing Mini Mokes

Gendarmes at the roundabout didn’t get the joke

Speeding down the hill like a Dassault Mirage

Parked it on the runway and I headed for le plage

Bar on fire, din of desire, dancing on a table, she was waving me in

Her name was Kyra, she knew no fear-a

Then introduced me to her vampirish friends

I’ve never seen such a girl

Was she from some future world?

Over thousand dollar vodka and kilos of caviar

I told them how I'd commandeered the oligarch’s car

They were laughing, speaking Russian and getting over served

When Kyra looked at me and said

"Could you take us round some curves?"

A chick drone strike is a lethal attack

You never see it coming and you can’t fight back

They feel entitled to all access from drugs to army camps

If you don’t believe me ask the generals down in Tampa

KGB and coppers seemed joined in the chase

Spectators lining the roads like a Grand Prix race

I dropped the girls at Ti St Barth to get them out of the commotion

And I missed the curve at Toiny and drove into the ocean

Underwater, my world is sinking

Will I wind up like Pussy Riot, that’s what I’m thinking

Feeling foolish, my faith’s a mystery

Don’t want polonium rolled up in my sushi

Oh, baby Jesus come through

I am in need of rescue

Now we can’t leave this white boy drowning in the dark

What the hell was he thinking, you don’t fuck around the sharks

Turns out the lovely Kyra held the most important tool

It was her daddy’s Lamborghini and she saved the crazy fool

No, he couldn’t surf or sing or play the guitar

They made an artificial reef out of the oligarch’s car

It was Kyra, lovely Kyra who got him off the hook

Then they took her yacht to Istanbul just to take a look

No, I couldn’t surf or sing or play the guitar

All I ever did was steal an oligarch’s car

My million dollar joy ride was not the perfect crime

But I’m not dead, still have my head, this Margarita needs more lime

Thanks to Utly for correcting these lyrics

Thanks to Bn for correcting these lyrics