J. Robert Spencer - Who\'s Crazy / My Psychopharmacologist And I lyrics

rate me

Dan:

Who’s crazy?

The husband or wife?

Who’s crazy?

To live their whole life

Believing that somehow

Things aren’t as bizarre as they are?

Who’s crazy—

The one who can’t cope,

Or maybe the one who’ll still hope?

The one who sees doctors

Or the one who just waits in the car?

And I was

A wild twenty-five,

And I loved

A wife so alive,

But now I believe I would settle

For one who and drive.

Doctor Fine: [Spoken]

The round blue ones with food, but not with the oblong

white ones, the white ones with the round yellow ones

but not the trapezoidal green ones. Split the green ones

into thirds with a tiny chisel, use a mortal and pestle to grind…

Diana:

My psychopharmacologist and I...

It’s like an odd romance—

Intense and very intimate,

We do our dance.

My psychopharmacologist and I...

Call it a lover’s game—

He knows my deepest secrets—

I know his...name.

And though he will never hold me,

He’ll always take my calls.

It’s truly like he told me:

Without a little lift,

The ballerina falls.

Doctor Fine: [Spoken]

Goodman, Diana. Bipolar depressive with delusional episodes.

Sixteen-year history of medication. Adjustments after one

week.

Diana: [Spoken]

I’ve got less anxiety, but I have headaches, blurry vision,

and I can’t feel my toes.

Doctor Fine: [Spoken]

So we’ll try again, and eventually we’ll get it right.

Diana: [Spoken]

Not a very exact science, is it?

Voices:

Zoloft and Paxil and Buspar and Xanax...

Depakote, Klonopin, Ambien, Prozac...

Ativan calms me when I see the bills—

These are a few of my favorite pills.

Diana: [Spoken]

Oh, thank, Doctor. Valium is my favorite color. How’d

you know?

Doctor Fine: [Spoken]

Goodman, Diana. Second adjustment after three weeks.

Delusions less frequent but depressive state worse.

Diana: [Spoken]

I’m nauseous and I’m constipated. Completely lost my

appetite and gained six pounds, which, you know, is

just not fair.

Diana, Doctor Fine & Voices:

May cause the following

Side effects, one or more:

Diana & Doctor Fine:

Dizziness, drowsiness,

Sexual dysfunction— Voices:

Headaches and tremors Diarrhea, constipation

And nightmares and Nervous laughter,

Seizures— Palpitations—

Diana, Doctor Fine & Voices:

Anxiousness, anger,

Exhaustion, insomnia,

Irritability,

Nausea, vomiting—

Diana:

Odd and alarming sexual feelings.

Diana, Doctor Fine & Voices:

Oh, and one last thing—

Doctor Fine:

Use may be fatal...

Gabe:

Use may be fatal...

Dan:

Use may be fatal...

Doctor Fine: [Spoken]

Goodman, Diana. Third adjustment after five weeks. Reports

continued mild anxiety and some lingering depression.

Diana: [Spoken]

I now can’t feel my fingers or my toes. I sweat profusely

for no reason. Fortunately, I have absolutely no desire for

sex. Although whether that’s the medicine or the marriage

is anybody’s guess.

Doctor Fine: [Spoken]

I’m sure it’s the medicine.

Diana: [Spoken]

Oh, thank you, that’s very sweet. But my husband’s waiting

in the car.

Dan:

Who’s crazy?

The one who’s half-gone?

Or maybe

The one who holds on?

Remembering when she was twenty,

And brilliant and bold.

And I was so young,

And so dumb,

And now I am old.

Diana:

And she was And though he’ll never

Wicked and wired. Hold me,

The sex was He’ll always take

Simply inspired. My calls.

Now there’s no sex, It’s truly like

She’s depressed, He told me—

And me I’m just tired. Without a little lift

Tired. Tired. Tired. The ballerina falls.

Who’s crazy— My psychopharmacologist

The one who’s uncured? And I,

Or maybe

The one who’s endured? Together side by side...

The one who has Without him I’d die...

Treatments,

Or the one who just My psychopharmacologist

Lives with the pain? And I.

They say love is blind,

But believe me—

Love is insane.

Doctor Fine: [Spoken]

Goodman, Diana. Seven weeks.

Diana: [Spoken]

I don’t feel like myself. I mean, I don’t feel anything.

Doctor Fine: [Spoken]

Hmpf. Patient stable.