Sway dasafo - Jason waste lyrics

rate me

Hi my name is Jason and I'm not gay

People call me a waste man, cause I haven't got a Job

Bed, up, make tea, shower, eat,

Paste, wheat, change, go, make pes,

Alarm snooze back to sleep

All of my little brothers, always call me a waste man

Because I'm 27, and I'm living down in the basement

I'm so complacent, so I will stay here

They're banging on my door, but I won't chase em

Cause I'm so lazy, the last few days I

Haven't seen day light, I haven't shaved

And they can say what they like, they just hate me

Cause I never let em have a go on my playstation (Piss Off)

They said I'm fat I need to go to the gym

I don't wanna be fat, I wanna be slim

Did a minute on the treadmill went for a swim

Little kids jumped out soon as I jumped in

Now I'm in the changing room

Hi my name is Jason and I'm not gay

I'm looking at your thing but it's not what you think

I'm thinking to myself why is mine not as big

So I think dirty thoughts so I can get it bigger

Beyonce look at me now I'm a killer

I said I'm not gay go away stop wishing

I just wanted a bit of stiff competition

(Em sorry Jason,) what, what do you want

(Erm we just had a compliant) piss off

(from a very valued client) I said piss off

(standing result I'm revoking your membership)

shut up I don't care

this is a crap gym

it doesn't work, how do I know it works

I'm still fat, why am I still fat

It's a s*** gym

I got a baby mum and a lovely little son

lovely boy but his is mum is very very dumb

I was very very drunk, told her lot of secrets

Very very drunk, told her not to keep it

Anyway she had it, sorry had him, Darren

His grandmother Karen, wanted to call him Gavin

But I didn't have it, I was working at Maplin

Gavin was my manager and I wanted to slap him

Cause he wanted to sack me, Cause I wanted to stab him

Cause my girl liked him and she wanted to shag him

He's a bit bigger but I know I could have him

At a matter of fact he kinda looks like Darren

I still got sacked and this is how it happened

Some Nigerian guy called Tunde

Who told me to call him Thomas for short

Walked into the store said he wanted to talk

At first I wasn't sure, but because he was nice to me

And he kinda showed me his nine

He bought a lot of stuff and he told me to swipe

But this is a woman's card (shut up it's for my wife)

He would come in like every fort night

And buy the same Ipod 4 times

Apparently he was doing the same thing with Tarke

Who told the police my name when it happened (It was Jason)

(Hello Jason)what (where from the metropolitan police pro department) Police

(Were like ask you) (excuse me)

Listen go away man I don't want to get arrested

I wanna rest (look) I wanna sleep (Your coming with me)

All my little brothers smokes weed come arrest them or they'll do murder

Bed

I can sleep till the world ends

I ain't in a rush for a girlfriend

All I ever do is fail them

Cause all I ever do is tell them the true

If your fat your fat b**** ain't nothing wrong with that

Don't switch I'm just telling you a fact

do you think your thin

(Well no)

Well then

(I hate you)

I abuse most of them

I think that's how I lose most of them

I don't want to get to close to them

After what happened to Elton in school

Elton was cool

But he had a girlfriend that didn't want to do things he wanted to do (I said no)

She said no but he went ahead and felt her (Get off me)

I think he's just coming out of Felter

My last girl was a wanna be wag (Hi)

Who went everywhere in a cab

I told her I'm rich

She took me to Harod

And picked up this gucci bag

Worth a grand

I went quite like words from my gran

Cause that's too much to spend on a slag

I mean that's too much to spend on a bag

As soon as we got to the till I ran (Where you going)

Then my mobile rang (Ello)

It was my first love ann (Hi Jason)

She said she split up with her man (He's gone)

And she's in need of a bang (Come round)

I'll be on a bus in a minute

She said "you better not buss in a minute"

I got prank and rushed to the chemist

Excuse me have you got anything for a man that ejaculates premature (Oh Yes)

He took me to the back of the store

He gave me a spray what's this for

(Put a little on the top just before)

Got to her house clock says 4

She's worn out I'm wanting more

Cause she's sore she went down south

And I think she's saying she can't feel her mouth

Oi Anna speak loud

Are you saying you cant feel your mouth

Are you saying where is this mouse

What you want me to take your couch

Look if you want to kiss me, out

That's when she kicked me ouch

I think she's trying to kick me out

Just tell me if you wanna get me out I'm gone<br />

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Thanks to razvan

Thanks to leno for correcting these lyrics