Boondox - My Van lyrics

rate me

Like clothes on the line I'm three sheets to the wind

But stay tighter than the strings on a violin

Me I'm as dirty as they come but still spic and span

I ride 28 inches on my creepy black van

And you can catch me posted up down by the trailer park

I'm selling bootleg movies from noon to dark

But at nine o'clock its time to close up shop

And find some unsuspecting girlie who gonna blow my top

I like cruising by the GAP and the OLD NAVY

I like scoping out the MILF's and the old ladies

Pulling right up to the curb with my windows pitch black

Practice catch and then release I do my thing and then I throw 'em back

MY VAN!

In my van they don't never see it coming

Stone cold killer slanging rock hard loving

In my van here's how we do

I got something waiting for you (chorus X2)

I never keep 'em very long because they tend to stink

And they'll be fucking up my camel skin zebra print seats

And I'm a mother fucking pimp so can't be cramping my style

With some decomposing stank ho wearing a smile

I gotta keep my reputation I got clientel

I can't be pushing Finding Nemo with no funky ass smell

I keep my Chevrolet polished and my shag rug vaccumed

And a sticker on the back glass says "shit happens"

And I'm cool as fan in my Burt Reynolds shades

But my futures pretty dim that's why I can't get laid

So Ima get it how I get gotta get up in them britches

Ima get it how I get Ima take it from these bitches!

CHORUS X2

If the van be a rocking then dontcha come a knocking

You might see me do the nasty face covered in a stocking

Nothing on but a tool belt and BVD's

A chick tied to a shelf full of DVD's

I got that old school porn showing in the headrest

Try choking out this honey but she ain't dead yet

I got her in the camel clutch, remote control stuck in her butt

She be switching scene selections everytime she bust a nut

You might say I'm kinda sick and you might call me a freak

Because I pull up to the intersection's gripping my meat

But to all them freaky bitches, bitches I be the man

I bet they never forget the time they had in MY VAN!

CHORUS X2

"Harmonica playing out"