Bob Corley - Number One Street lyrics
rate meIt is vacation time and we had decided<br />
That we'd go down yonder to Florida<br />
For it, don't you know<br />
<br />
Well, everybody told us that we<br />
Ought to go on Number One Street<br />
So we got on to it at Jacksonville<br />
<br />
And we had rid long there just a short ways<br />
When I saw this sign that said<br />
Free picnic tables, one mile<br />
So I said, let's stop and get us one<br />
<br />
Well, we had an awful time<br />
Getting it into the car<br />
It is made out of, it is made out<br />
Of concrete and all, you Know<br />
<br />
It crowded us so that I'd kinda wished<br />
That we had waited until we was<br />
On our way back to picked it up<br />
<br />
There's another billboard there<br />
There's all kinds of things to see<br />
If you've ever driven Number One Street<br />
You probably seen em<br />
<br />
There's a sign there, big billboard there<br />
It said, Sea Zoo, see a man eating fish<br />
Well, now that didn't interest us cause<br />
We was back here when the college boys<br />
Used to swaller em whole<br />
<br />
Bout this time, I was getting a little thirsty<br />
And we rode on down the highway there<br />
And I saw this sign that said, all the<br />
Orange juice that you can drink for a dime<br />
I said, stop the car right here<br />
Florida is fixing to get bankruptured<br />
<br />
Well, sir, we stopped there<br />
And I went up to the girl and I says<br />
Is that sign right, all the orange juice<br />
You can drink for a dime<br />
And she says, it sure is<br />
<br />
I says, here's my dime<br />
I'd like a glass of orange juice, please<br />
Well, she poured it out there<br />
And I drunk it down, it was good too<br />
And I said, I believe I'd like<br />
Another glass of orange juice<br />
<br />
And she said, that'll be another dime<br />
And I said, what do you mean<br />
Your sign there says, all the<br />
Orange juice you can drink for a dime<br />
And she says, well, you had one glass<br />
And that's all you can drink for a dime<br />
<br />
They's just a heap of sights down there<br />
That's worth looking at in Florida<br />
One of em was advertised right smart<br />
We kept seeing these billboards that said<br />
See Silver Springs through our glass bottoms<br />
<br />
Nothing would do but that we had to go<br />
So we went over there and we rid over<br />
The clearest water while the boat driver<br />
He named off all the springs<br />
<br />
They all had purty names<br />
The perry castle, the bridal chamber<br />
All except one and it is called<br />
The bottomless pit<br />
<br />
Well, the boat driver, he says, friends<br />
You're looking into the bottomless pit<br />
A spring so deep that no human eye<br />
Can see to the bottom<br />
<br />
It upset me when he said that cause I was<br />
Looking all the way to the bottom at the time<br />
And you know what was down there<br />
It is a sign that said, See Rock City<br />
<br />
Well, after we left Silver Springs there<br />
We got back on the number one street<br />
And headed on South<br />
<br />
Pretty soon, the driver<br />
He stopped the car<br />
And says, we're in Miami<br />
We've run out of land but if you<br />
Wanna sit in the car and wait a while<br />
They'll dredge up some more<br />
<br />
And I said, if it's all the same to you<br />
I'd just as leave, go by a boat<br />
You see, we'd hit on this idea<br />
Of a different vacation like<br />
Visiting a foreign land<br />
And we had decided<br />
That we'd go over yonder<br />
To the British island of Nausea<br />
<br />
Well, Sir, we got onto this boat<br />
Ship, I believe, the captain called it<br />
The S.S. Queen of Nausea<br />
And we sought sail<br />
That must be what the S.S. is for<br />
Sought Sail<br />
<br />
In no time at all hardly<br />
We's surrounded complete by water<br />
And not a sight of land nowhere<br />
Cept under my fingernails<br />
<br />
I had the horrible feeling<br />
That we was lost at sea til I saw<br />
This big fish cork with a bell on it<br />
A ringing and a bobbing like<br />
A whale had tied into the line<br />
<br />
Well, I knowed right then<br />
That we wasn't lost<br />
Cause there's a sign on that fish cork<br />
It said, Stuckey's, ten miles<br />
<br />
Well, by next morning<br />
We had reached Nausea for sure<br />
So we went on shore to be touristers<br />
We saw the native straw market<br />
Where the natives is making<br />
All kinds of things outta straw<br />
But mostly, they is making money<br />
Out of the touristers<br />
<br />
It was all that the travel folders<br />
Said it was and more<br />
Rare, charming, old world, exotic Nausea<br />
Wasn't only exotic, it was expensive<br />
<br />
They had a native kind of music there<br />
In the nightclubs that they call Calypso<br />
Them are songs that tell a story<br />
Usually sad<br />
<br />
Well, Sir, when they brought the bill<br />
For the evening's entertainment<br />
I felt like writing one of them songs<br />
Right then and there<br />
I was gonna call it, The Tourister's Lament<br />
Or the I Ain't Never Been Calypso<br />
<br />
I had heard about the favorable<br />
I had heard about the favorable<br />
Rate of exchange over there for your money<br />
But I found out, it's in their favor<br />
<br />
We had what they call, an all expense tour<br />
And it sure was<br />
<br />
Well, finally we got back to Miami<br />
Florida, US of A and was getting<br />
Set to go ashore and they told us<br />
That we have to go through a custom<br />
<br />
Well, I went and this feller, he said to me<br />
Are you an American citizen, and I said<br />
Look here, I ain't been gone a week hardly yet<br />
And you done forgot that I'm a citizen<br />
Well, I am, thankfully<br />
<br />
And he says, what have you got to declare<br />
And I said, I declare I'm broke<br />
And glad to get back<br />
<br />
So then he said that we could go ashore<br />
And we went and got in the car and<br />
Headed back up Number One Street<br />
Just as fast as we could go<br />
<br />
And friends, I'm telling you<br />
If you ain't never been to Nausea<br />
Don't go, just send your money
