Groucho Marx - Laws Of The Administration lyrics

rate me

<b>Laws Of The Administration</b> by <i>Groucho Marx</i><br />

Spoken:

Lady:

If it's not asking too much,

Sung:

For our information

Just for illustration

Tell us how you intend to run the nation

Rufus T. Firefly:

These are the laws of my administration

No one's allowed to smoke

Or tell a dirty joke

And whistling is forbidden

Chorus:

We're not allowed to tell a dirty joke

Hail, hail Freedonia

Rufus:

If chewing gum is chewed

The chewer is pursued

And in the hooscall hidden

Chorus:

If we choose to chew we'll be pursued

Rufus:

If any form of pleasure is exibited

Report to me and it will be prohibited

I'll put my foot down, so shall it be

This is the land of the free

The last man nearly ruined this place

He didn't know what to do with it

If you think this country's bad off now,

Just wait 'til I get through with it

The country's taxes must be fixed

And I know what to do with it

If you think you're paying too much now

Just wait till I get throught with it

*whistle*

I will not stand for anything that's crooked or unfair

I'm strictly on the upper knot, so everyone beware

If any man's caught taking graft, and I don't get my share

We stand'im up against the wall and pop! Goes the weasel

Chorus:

So everyone beware, you're stricken or unfair

-------unless he gets his share

Rufus:

If any man should come between a husband and his bride

We'll find out which one she prefers by letting her decide

If she prefers the other man, the husband steps outside

We stand him up against the wall and pop! Goes the weasel

Chorus:

The husband steps outside, relinquishes his bride

They stand him up against the wall and take him for white