Glenn Sutton - The Football Card lyrics
rate meWell, the gambling bug, <br />
Bit a lot of men.<br />
But what it done to me, <br />
Is a rotten sin.<br />
I've bet myself, <br />
Right outa house and home.<br />
<br />
'Cause there ain't nothin', <br />
This side of hell, <br />
I cannot pick a winner, <br />
In the NFL.<br />
? est, <br />
When your luck is goin' wrong.<br />
<br />
I was on the job, and, <br />
Workin' hard, <br />
When a man come along<br />
With this football card, and said, <br />
Try your luck, boy, <br />
All your friends have won.<br />
<br />
So I played the thing, <br />
For a week or two, <br />
And got a little behind, <br />
Like most folks do.<br />
And started doublin' up, <br />
And that's when, <br />
They cost me some.<br />
<br />
Well I lost my furniture<br />
On my Denver bet.<br />
And Oakland got my new Corvette.<br />
And the Rams are the reason<br />
I cashed in 5 hot checks.<br />
<br />
The Cardinals took my savings account, <br />
And the Redskins got a similar amount, <br />
That I borrowed from a finance company<br />
On a ninety-day note.<br />
<br />
Then Dallas put me in a helluva fix.<br />
I gave up seven, <br />
They won by six.<br />
You'd think that Staughback, <br />
Personally, hated me.<br />
<br />
The Green Bay Packers, <br />
Were doin' fine, <br />
'Til they had to into overtime, <br />
And when they got plus one, <br />
You're dead when you win by three.<br />
<br />
Then along come the Baltimore Colts<br />
For another stack of the cool c-notes.<br />
Seems I can't win no matter, <br />
What I try.<br />
<br />
Burt Jones might be their franchise, <br />
But the way he bloodshot<br />
These old eyes<br />
Is enough to make a grown man sit and cry.<br />
<br />
Well the Pittsburgh Steelers<br />
Left no choice, <br />
But for my purdy wife<br />
To file for divorce<br />
On the simple grounds of football cruelty.<br />
<br />
And I heard somewhere<br />
That the Bears were hot.<br />
So? I<br />
Took another shot.<br />
And you guessed it pal, <br />
The Falcons beat 'em forty to three.<br />
<br />
And then Seattle<br />
In the cool?<br />
Made me wish I'd never been born.<br />
I even let Tampa Bay take a shot at me.<br />
<br />
But I've got the Bengals and Chargers to thank, <br />
For the losses that drove me<br />
To rob that bank.<br />
Even the cop that arrested me<br />
Looked like a referee.<br />
<br />
Now here I sit<br />
With this stupid grin, <br />
And the jury's just now comin' back in, <br />
And the foreman and the judge<br />
Are lookin' at me real hard.<br />
<br />
And I know in my heart<br />
What they're gonna say.<br />
They gotta put me away<br />
Where I can't play, <br />
That American dream<br />
Of tryin' to beat that football card.<br />
<br />
Bum Phillips has made a bum outa me.<br />
Miami Dolphins outa put me in that?<br />
They flipped my wallet enough.<br />
Them Detroit Lions, ewwww, <br />
They rollered through me, <br />
Like Gunther Gable Williams.<br />
<br />
I'd like to get my hands on Fran Tarkenton, <br />
Scramble his brains.<br />
Archie Manning and the Saints, ewww.<br />
The Jets, ha ha<br />
<br />
Mercy, football, ha ha...
