Eric Schwartz - Aisle B lyrics

rate me

<b>Aisle B</b> by <i>Eric Schwartz</i><br />

My girlfriend got sick

And she needed a few things

But she couldn’t get out of her bed

So she wrote me a list

She sent me to the drugstore

I went up to the sales girl and said

"Tell me...where are the tampons and

Tell me, how to heal canker sores

Sell me what you take with a cramp on

'cause if she don’t stop whining

She won’t need no tampons no more...”

She said

“Aisle b

That’s where you’ll find them

Aisle b

Near the feminine sprays”

Aisle b

Where they'd carefully aligned them

To make damn well sure

I'd be shopping for tampons for days...

So I picked up a basket, and went down and found her

Anything she could squirt or insert or inject

And when I was done

I brought them up to the counter

Where each item I bought was price-checked

Hair pluckers, zit suckers, unstuckers for stomach unease

Inner incense for a scent like a warm country breeze...

I later discovered the whole thing was a setup

They taped me from beginning to end

I shoulda known better,

This chick hasn't let up since she found out I did her best friend

I packed up my things

With my ego eroded

I went back to live with my mom

If you don’t believe me

The mpeg’s uploaded at "Guys Buying Tampons dot com"

Aisle b the dreams aren't stopping

Aisle b, never again

Aisle b, girls, do your own shopping

Unless you are trying to make a mess of your men....