Why now am I reminded of my lost humanity? <br />
Scents of familiar music upon the grieving wind<br />
My seething mind is a questing razor<br />
Memories come unbidden in the shadows<br />
The miserable shape of the bottomless past<br />
Empty with shock and the stress of thinning emotions<br />
Eternity is but another season<br />
And it too shall pass away<br />
<br />
This timeless void of running seems like sullen stagnation<br />
Spans the self-imposed tyranny of loneliness<br />
Poignant impressions of each moment<br />
The burning path is the one of change<br />
<br />
Absorbing the pain as if to defend my confines<br />
Personality conditioned by changing behaviors<br />
The indefinite ways the cosmos might conform<br />
Framed by doubt and dreams of the end<br />
<br />
There are no miracles, there is no resurrection<br />
Prescience is the result of a drug<br />
The holy land is a violent place<br />
Sweeping visions shall reap heavenly crusades<br />
<br />
Denying variety and time without parallels<br />
Demanding that all follow a predetermined pattern<br />
Reducing all to absurdity to justify my fear<br />
Control is another illusion - Let go of the universe! <br />
<br />
Still they marvel at the light from stars long dead<br />
All is transient, forever scattering<br />
Still they revel in the bloom of youth<br />
Yearning for the touch of another human being<br />
Still theories are accepted as immutable laws<br />
Wizened by lore yet ignorant of life<br />
A consequence lost is another lesson lost<br />
I know it in myself<br />
<br />
The mistakes of chance and heredity<br />
The recessive undesirable traits<br />
The madness of singularity<br />
The foolishness of certainty and precision<br />
<br />
I am not a rebel, but a closet aristocrat<br />
Cynical, depraved and in denial<br />
Vigor has fallen to paradox<br />
No longer can I strive or grow for I am now god<br />
I am the living trigger and the framer of thoughts<br />
Killing and reforming the archetype<br />
The futility of megalomania<br />
Looking back, I resent everythinga