Chess - The Merchandisers lyrics

rate me

The Soloists:

Whether you are pro or anti,

Or could not care less,

We are here to tell you

We are here to sell you chess.

Not a chance of you escaping

From our wiles,

We've locked the doors,

We've blocked the aisles,

We've a franchise worth exploiting

And we will, yes we will!

When it comes to merchandising

We could kill.

Female Soloists:

When you get up--

Male Soloists:

When you get up in the morning--

Soloists:

Till your bedtime book,

You will have to live your life

With bishop, knight, and rook.

Male Soloists:

Clean your teeth with

Checkered toothpaste,

Wear our vests.

Female Soloists:

Our kings, and queens

On bouncing breasts.

Soloists:

You could even buy a set,

And learn to play.

We don't mind,

We'll sell you something

Anyway.

We've done all

Our market research,

And our finding show

That this game of chess

Will be around a month or so.

Maybe it's a bit confusing

For a game,

But Rubik's cubes

Were much the same.

In the end

The whole world bought one--

All were gone,

By which time

We merchandisers

Had moved on!

By which time

We merchandisers

Had moved on!