By Jeeves movie - It's a Pig! lyrics
rate me<br>
HONORIA<br>
Who are you? Someone quick! There's a man broken in!<br>
In a pig mask, broken in my bedroom!<br>
Stand well clear! He's all mine!<br>
I can deal with this swine<br>
With this chauvinist pig in my bedroom!<br>
When I'm through, I will bet<br>
You will live to regret<br>
that you picked on me, you and I ever met<br>
I'm teaching you a lesson that you never will forget<br>
You're a pig! What a pig! What a pig! <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
Oh dear, help! It's a pig! Daddy, help it's a pig!<br>
There's a beastly piggy in my bedroom <br>
<br>
HONORIA<br>
Cornered! He's cornered! <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
Is it real or a dream?<br>
Get away, or I'll scream!<br>
Who on earth let this pig in my bedroom? <br>
<br>
HONORIA<br>
Lend a hand! Bar the door!<br>
And we've trapped him for sure <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
I shall die if the thing makes a mess on my floor... <br>
<br>
HONORIA<br>
Speaking as a woman who has hunted wild boar<br>
What's a pig, more or less? What's a pig?<br>
Now we've got him! <br>
<br>
BERTIE<br>
Look, it's Bertie... <br>
<br>
HONORIA<br>
Nice and easy... <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
It's so dirty! <br>
<br>
BERTIE<br>
Listen, Maddy... <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
Don't come near me! <br>
<br>
HONORIA<br>
Don't dare touch her, do you hear me! <br>
<br>
BERTIE<br>
Oh, this damn thing's stuck completely!<br>
Exit Wooster, swift and sweetly! <br>
<br>
HONORIA/MADELINE<br>
Follow that pig! <br>
<br>
BASSETT<br>
Bless my soul! Who are you? What on earth's going on?<br>
There's a circus artist in my bedroom <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
Stop him! <br>
<br>
HONORIA<br>
We've got him! <br>
<br>
BASSETT<br>
Can't believe both my eyes<br>
There's a chap in disguise<br>
There's a cat burgling pig in my bedroom<br>
Careful, girls, all stand back<br>
He may try to attack...<br>
It's a well known fact that they hunt as a pack<br>
Wait while I distract him, try to put him off the track<br>
Watch that pig! <br>
<br>
HONORIA<br>
Watch the pig! <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
Watch the pig! <br>
<br>
BERTIE<br>
Listen, people... <br>
<br>
BASSETT<br>
Don't you try it! <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
Tried to kiss me <br>
<br>
BERTIE<br>
I deny it! <br>
<br>
BASSETT<br>
Oh, you swine you! <br>
<br>
HONORIA<br>
Caught him looting! <br>
<br>
BASSETT<br>
Raise your hands or I'll start shooting! <br>
<br>
BERTIE<br>
With a badly bruised libido<br>
Exit Wooster tres rapido <br>
<br>
HONORIA, MADELINE, BASSETT<br>
Follow that pig! <br>
Hunt the pig! Hunt the pig! Hunt the two-legged pig!<br>
There's a pig loose somewhere in the house here <br>
<br>
GUSSIE/HONORIA/MADELINE<br>
Find him! <br>
<br>
<br>
BASSETT/GUSSIE<br>
And catch him! <br>
<br>
MADELINE/HONORIA<br>
Everybody look out<br>
For the glimpse of a snout <br>
<br>
BASSETT/GUSSIE<br>
For the click of his trotters on the stairway <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
There he is! <br>
<br>
HONORIA<br>
False alarm! <br>
<br>
BASSETT<br>
We must try to keep calm <br>
<br>
MADELINE<br>
I'm afraid! I'm afraid! <br>
<br>
GUSSIE<br>
Then take hold of my arm <br>
<br>
BASSETT<br>
I'll let him have both barrels, it'll work just like a charm<br>
On the pig <br>
<br>
BERTIE<br>
Steady on! <br>
<br>
ALL<br>
There's the pig!<br>
There's the pig! There's the pig! There's the housebreaker pig!<br>
There's the pig with criminal intentions<br>
Once he's caught there is talk<br>
We'll reduce him to pork<br>
In a way that's too terrible to mention<br>
Can't escape, now he's caught<br>
He can grunt he can snort<br>
It's a great new game, chasing porkers for sport<br>
Now we've got him cornered there's a lesson to be taught<br>
To the pig, to the pig, to the pig <br>
<br>
