Bill Bailey - Unisex Chip Shop lyrics

rate me

I used to buy my chips

From an oppressive chip shop regime,

The girl who worked there

She seemed happy

But I knew it was not what it seemed,

"Do you want salt and vinegar?"

Was what they made her say,

But in the language of the ghetto

That means "Help,

I'm a woman in chains!"

I wanted to free her,

In my dreams I would see her

Running naked through the woods round Rainham

If I had some tigers I'd train them

To protect her

From the sexual facism that was lurking round the gherkins

I'd lean across the counter and we would talk,

I carved her name, Debbie, on a little wooden fork,

But into the shop came a skin-head gang

They snatched the fork from my hand

Debbie, she looked at me

To assert my masculinty I said "Oi!"

They said "What?!"

I said "Nothing."