Bilge Pumps - Old Dun Cow lyrics

rate me

Some friends and I in a public house

Was playin' dominoes one night

When into the pub a fireman ran

His face all chalky white.

"What's up", says Brown, "Have you seen a ghost,

Or have you seen your Aunt Mariah?"

"Me Aunt Mariah be buggered!", says he,

"The bleedin' pub's on fire!"

Chorus:

And there was Brown upside down

Moppin' up the whiskey on the floor.

"Booze, booze!" The firemen cried

As they came knockin' on the door (clap clap)

Oh don't let 'em in till it's all drunk up

And somebody shouted MacIntyre! MACINTYRE!

And we all got blue-blind paralytic drunk

When the Old Dun Cow caught fire.

"Oh well," says Brown, "What a bit of luck.

Everybody follow me.

And it's down to the cellar

If the fire's not there

Then we'll have a drunken spree."

So we went on down with good old Brown

The booze we could not miss

And we hadn't been there ten minutes or more

Till we were quite like this...

Chorus

Then, Smith walked over to the port wine tub

And gave it just a few hard knocks (clap clap)

Started takin' off his pantaloons

Likewise his shoes and socks.

"Hold on, " says Brown, "that ain't allowed

Ya cannot do that down here.

Don't go washin' out your trotters in the finest wine tub

When we got Miller Lite beer."

Chorus

And then there came a great big crash

Half the bloody roof gave way.

We were almost drowned in the firemen's hose

Though still we were gonna stay

So we got some tacks and some old wet sacks

And we nailed ourselves inside

And we sat there getting bleary-eyed drunk

'Til we was petrified.

Chorus

At last the firemen got inside

And found us all dead drunk

But like true heroes, as they could

They helped us in our funk

They saw the booze upon the floor

And gave a sudden yell

Then the took their helmets off

And dropped and drank like hell

Chorus

Later that night, as the fire burned down

We emerged from the cellar below.

Our booze was drunk, our pub was burned

And our spirits sank quite low.

"Oh, look!", says Brown as he checked his watch

By the light of the dying fire.

"Now we gotta get down to Clancy's Bar

It closes on the hour!"

Chorus