Amateur Transplants - Libel Case lyrics

rate me

Do I attract you,

Do I repulse you

With my greasy beard?

And is my perving

Slightly un-nerving?

Yes, I'm a little bit weird

I can be gentle

I can be mental

I am repulsive and camp

Nobody likes me

Nobody likes me

I am an hideous tramp

My name is Matthew Kelly

I used to do Stars In Their Eyes

Till I was sacked from the telly

After some peodophile lies

I was accused

Of having abused

A twelve-year-old child

He was molested

I was arrested

There was a high-profile trial

I was acquitted

No crime was committed

The jury believed my excuse

This song is over

I've gotta go before

Somebody sues.