25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee movie - My Unfortunate Erection (Chip's Lament) lyrics

rate me

<br>

CHIP<br>

(spoken) Fritos! M & M’s? Oreos. All for one dollar.<br>

(sung) It is tradition<br>

That the person eliminated<br>

From the competition<br>

Is fair game for derision<br>

Especially the alpha-male<br>

Will sell goodies at the bake sale<br>

<br>

Anyone for brownies<br>

Anyone for chocolate chips<br>

Anyone for anything<br>

That isn’t dated<br>

How could I have been<br>

Eliminated?<br>

You wanna know how?<br>

You wanna know how?<br>

You wanna know why?<br>

<br>

My unfortunate erection<br>

Is destroying my perfection<br>

It is my recollection<br>

That everything I once did<br>

I did perfectly<br>

(spoken) Last year’s champ defeated!<br>

(sung) Because of<br>

Marigold Coneybear<br>

Because there’s something and not a thing between us<br>

I don’t blame my brain but I do blame my penis<br>

<br>

My unfortunate protuberance<br>

Seems to have its own exuberance<br>

Anyone for M & M’s?<br>

Delicious and appropriate<br>

Anyone for Chewy Goobers?<br>

Inexpensive<br>

Anyone for buying the shit that I’m selling?<br>

Because my stiffy has ruined my spelling<br>

<br>

Erection<br>

Erection<br>

My unfortunate erection<br>

Whoa<br>

It’s ruining my life<br>

It’s ruining my world<br>

It’s ruining my<br>

Ruining<br>

Ruining<br>

Ruining my life<br>

My life<br>

<br>

Adulthood brings its own peculiar rejection<br>

Which is why I’m selling this PTA<br>

Confection<br>

It will ruin your complexion<br>

All because of my unfortunate<br>

Erection<br>

Oh God!<br>

<br>

<br>